'I feel very attached to my queer identity'

TRANSCRIPT

NOAH: So… I first came out as lesbian, and then bisexual, and then I came out as trans, and then, and then I came out as a gay man after being trans – after coming out as being trans, and then came out as a pansexual gay man. So my sexual identity has gone through a lot of evolving, and I’m happy for it to evolve more in the future if it wants to. That’s fine! [Laughs] I definitely feel very attached to my queer identity, I wouldn’t want to let go of it, so it would, I think it would be a challenge to be straight, but you know, if that happens it happens, but… I don’t see it happening to be honest! [Laughs]…Yeah, it’s, it’s very important to me, because I feel… like it’s my whole life, my queer identity. I feel it’s a big part of me personally… and it’s a connection to my, my community, the gay and trans community.

INTERVIEWER: You first came out actually in high school, but you came to realise you were different at a very young age.

NOAH: Yeah, I came out in high school sexuality-wise, and I came out… as, as trans in university, a lot later on. But… my, my experience in high school was that I was just – I just was. I was the only out person… but not really because I came out and declared my gayness, but because I didn’t hide it more, more really. It was a fact that I just talked about my partners, and – as freely as I would anything else, as anyone else would. And I got… noticed by one person who said something positive, they… said that I was brave and that they was quite impressed that I was out, and, and they thought it was a good thing, and then that’s really nice thinking about it, looking back, but at the time I didn’t think much about it, I thought, oh, well, I’m just doing me, I’m just doing my thing, so… I didn’t really understand why they would make that comment, but it is lovely that that person was showing support so young as well, as well as me being out so young.

INTERVIEWER: So was it actually encouraged when they are saying something positive?

NOAH: I didn’t get any encouragement… I mean, I, I was quite different from everyone, sexuality aside, but… I did feel very othered. I didn’t have much support until I joined a gay youth group locally, and I felt – I think my mum noticed I was very, very unhappy, and she couldn’t help me ‘cause it was beyond her capability of helping – is, I think she actually said that as well, so she’s, she directed me to this group where they could potentially help me, or I could talk about the things that was going on. So that happened and I think that was, that was… erm, crucial to me as a teenager at the time, ‘cause I can imagine me going off the rails or going… getting really bad with depression if it wasn’t for being referred to, being directed towards, this youth group, LGBT youth group.